..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
