I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
