how can u be prego again
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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