I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
