I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
