you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.