Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
