a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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