I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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