I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
