your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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