so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize