If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
