You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
