i may or may not be watching the land before time
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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