Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Randomize
