It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
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