hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize