apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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