how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
