The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
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I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
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laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
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