A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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