he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
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