She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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