I'm lost and stupid without you.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I want to be your penis for a week.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize