Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
