I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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