just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
