I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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