I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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