I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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