Your tits are I can't wait for
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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