I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize