I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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