So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
