she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
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