porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
