What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
