i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
