respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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