Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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