Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
