Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
my nose is crying tears of wow.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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