No, you can still breathe under the balls.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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