it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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