Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
