I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
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