how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
