Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I am one with the molecules
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
