My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
