Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
