Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Randomize